Bakit?

Hobby ng ilang barkadahan ang: pasahang boyfriend.

Sweet Dream or...

I've been having semi-nightmares two days in a row. And as with most dreams, I faintly remember the details, but not the "bad" feeling after. First night, I remember opening my eyes and seeing a void. It was black all over. No varying shades of darkness, just black. And then last night, I remember being trapped on a floor of an abandoned building. There was a real sense of fear... of what, I can no longer remember. But you know what I do recall? That building having no walls then "growing" those capiz windows of old Spanish-era houses. They start from the regular size we always see and then they spread out to form whole panels of walls. Think Japanese houses with paper wall divisions. The capiz colonies were just like that, translucent, emitting an amber glow.

On other news, it's time for a little morbidity. When I die, I want everyone to come in white. I want to be burned with my ashes in front of my cutesy surfing picture blown up in a large tarp. Sure, I want emo-moments from those I'll be leaving behind. But I want them to be happy emo-moments. And play Pink's "Raise Your Glass" as my farewall song. That would be awesome!

God willing, these things won't be carried out anytime soon... that I'm sure of :P

Cheers!

*Edit:

Day 3 semi-nightmare involved finding myself and my brother in a three story shanty crumbling down to the ground. So much for a three-night streak.

Busy People - 1035

A hundred or so windows
A thousand or so people
A million things to do
And a billion thoughts.

Yet as I look out my corner
Only a smile frames my face
For fleeting moments find stillness
In that tight embrace.

When the rain

Is blowing in your face

And the whole world

Is on your case

I could offer you

A warm embrace

To make you feel my love

When the evening shadows

And the stars appear

And there is no one there

To dry your tears

I could hold you

For a million years

To make you feel my love

Make You Feel My Love

- Bob Dylan/Adele

Jaw Drop

Indulge me friends, I was stalking my "someone" when I decided to google "darcdiaries." My jaw dropped when I found this. And the comment by summer:

"u'r a celebrity in ur own right! m nt rily into blogs inintroduc lng cia skin ng isa s mga frends ko. bt there's 3 of u n binak-read ko tlga & up until now eh inaabangn evrytm me new posts, soltero's, darcdiaries & of course u buqui. u guys nevr fail 2mke me, laugh & vice-versa. ds post mde me cry, tz a hapi endng i knw bt it stil mde me cry. at sobrng inggit ako sau. ang haba ng herang mu te, mula sorsogon ng-round3p pblik mnla. m dfinitly gona get a copy of ur book.pki-post nmn po wen it'l b out.i hop & pray dat i find my schoolboi as wel pro sna sooner n.hihi.tc buqui",mwaahugsmuch.

08.02.2011 by summer"

Seriously, my jaw dropped... and I blushed :P

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(Of course, this is on the assumption that I'm the "darcdiaries" mentioned; otherwise, feelingero na naman ako. Fail! Lol)

Closet K...

I was feeling down a couple of days ago. I was slumped on our sofa-bed, uninterested as I flipped from channel to channel. With me was my older brother, both parents and our sister were busy with their respective affairs outside. Around 7:00pm, Nanay arrived home and said, "Sale ang Home World sa Megatrade." I replied, "Hanggang 12:00am ang mall!"

If other people like spending on gadgets or clothes, I on the other hand throw away any semblance of a savings plan when it comes to "home" stuff. I remember emptying my then - and still - almost-non-existent savings account just to buy a sofa-bed, a shoe cabinet, a dresser, and a closet. That's when we moved houses a year back. Occassionally, I'd buy some doormats, bathroom mats, and oh, don't get me started with curtains. There was even a time when I asked Nanay to come with me to Divisoria just so we could buy fabric for curtains! I really don't know, I get all excited with furniture and things to keep organized. Boxes! And envelopes and racks! Haha, it's my OC-ness getting a domesticated twist.

Recently, in spite of my not so green thumb, I've taken an interest to gardening. I asked for some ferns from a friend and bought a plant box and some coconut husks to keep them in. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that they'd survive, brushing aside my recent history of lavender and mint plants dying on me. And yep, aside from the department store's "home" section, I also love the hardware store. I like looking around for lighting fixtures, floor tiles, and bathroom accessories! Shower heads, faucets, and all that jazz! Haha, I'm such a handyman dork.

Anyway, going back to Nanay's sale announcement, we waited for Tatay to arrive so that we'd have someone drive us (Yes, at 26, I still don't know how to drive. Come to think of it, the money I spent on that sale would've been my driving school money!). I ended up buying two chairs for my humble dining table and a single burner stove to replace our old one. Tatay fancied the one-hand pepper crusher, so we ended up buying that one too. Haha. But seriously, if I had it my way, I would've bought an induction stove instead. That has been my dream for a while now. Haha. Crazy, a lot of people fancy a new iPad, I dream of having an induction stove complete with a full range of iron pots and pans! Haha

Anyway, here are the new additions to my "cutesy" dining set. I just have to re-varnish the table to a darker shade and patch some areas with wood putty. There's a sort-of-furniture shop near our place and Tatay asked someone to take a look at the table and the work that I "wanted" to get done. Needless to say, we didn't meet eye-to-eye with Kuya Karpintero. I had to restrain myself from quipping, "Eh ano na lang ang trabahong madali?!" when Kuya Karpintero said that "mahihirapan akong mag-masilya noong lamesa." Seriously? I know I'm far from the engineer/technical guy that my grade school/high school tried to make out of us but I've had my share of wood work, metal work and electrical what-not. I have a closet-karpintero in me, that's for sure. Anyway, "home" stuff make me incoherent. I blab on and on. Haha

P.S. Geek and [g], para sa inyo talaga ang pagbili ko ng bagong upuan. So sabihan niyo ako kung dadaan kayo sa bahay this weekend. I prefer Sunday night, bow. Lol

My Biggest Fault...

I've been feeling down and I have a hint why. Sometimes I just wish I could let go easily. Stop overthinking, stop reading between the lines... especially when there's actually nothing there to think about or to read.

*****

When you feel sad, it does make a difference to hold your head high. You suddenly feel better when you decide to leave that slump and walk tall. Looking at the sky brings a certain calm as well.

*****

They say that consistency is a sign of sincerity. How I wish everything and everyone in my world is consistent, coherent even. Perhaps then, I won't waste too much time second-guessing and swimming in my own paranoia.

*****

On other news, seeing your kids graduate brings a certain kind of joy. And when you're down, thinking about that particular moment inevitably brings a smile.