Lesson Learned

First of all, my world is getting smaller. Aside from the many actual and near brush ups with people I personally know offline, I've just recently discovered that my ex has a blogger account! Turns out he has been on blogspot for about three years at the very least! If and when he happens to visit this page, I'd probably need to kill (as Geek puts it) my blog a second time.

Anyway, scrolling through his blog, I read a particular revelation as to why he decided not to contact me for more or less a month after a "fight." He wanted to teach me a lesson, he says. Interestingly, the teacher that I am, I am quite averse to the idea of teaching someone a lesson especially when it comes to relationships. I'd probably understand parents trying to teach their kids lessons but there's something off about a partner purposely trying to mold his partner's character, way of life or outlook.

Or maybe I'm just justifying myself. I do not react very well to my partner "teaching" me a lesson (case in point, I "discarded" him from my life, something that Geek thinks was a good awakening on my part, thank you very much!). There's just something inherently mean about the whole idea when working on a relationship must spring from mutual respect and love. I don't know if it's misplaced idealism or just plain romanticism but "correcting" your partner's ways isn't something you do. Well if your partner changes for the better because of you then that's great! That's what you call inspiration. But for someone to impose a "lesson" on another? That just leaves a bad taste in the mouth.

But then again, we grow and we mature. No one is beyond reproach and I've convinced myself to be more gracious and accepting of "lessons." Of course that comes at a price. You temporarily trade off your pride and self worth for an opportunity to better yourself... which is actually a gamble. After all, we're talking about just an "opportunity." Actualizing it is a totally different matter.

Anyway, I think I'm already rambling. Suffice to say that should you allow someone to "teach" you a lesson, just make sure that that someone's worth it... if not, you'll end up not just with a broken heart but also a shattered sense of self-worth.