I am mustering the audacity to write down my rule book - lessons on heartbreak that must be considered before taking second, third, fourth, fifth or nth chances. Why? For catharsis and for the benefit of those in la la la land who are shackled by hopes - hopes that things will get better that's why you hold on and you continue to take chances. I recognize the bitterness so there's no need to point that one out. Chances are these rules are applicable only to those who choose to believe them. After all, to romanticize is one of humanity's greatest follies.
Lesson #1: The Glass Jar Principle
Lesson #2: The Law of Worth and Risks
If a third party presents itself, which would you rather choose: that both you and your partner sort out the mess together or have him conceal everything to you until such time that he has cleared his mind and made a final decision?
The romantic answer is to sort out things together. After all, it was the two of you who entered the relationship; ergo, the responsibility of fixing things - even if it's a third party you're partner is going gaga over - falls on both your shoulders. Unfortunately, only the strong is able to go through this romantic choice unscathed.
If your partner goes out on an adventure to explore and makes an excuse that such will be for the better - a stronger relationship that will withstand future temptations, I suggest you re-assess. If he can't resist the current temptation, what assurance do you have that he will be able to resist those that are yet to come? Besides, him going on a supposed journey to enlightenment equates to him saying to your face:
"I'm going on a field trip. This might ruin our relationship but I'm taking it anyway. It's worth the risk. You are worth risking."
Bottomline? If he loves you, he'd know that you're not worth risking.
Next lesson: The Matter Theory
- My Facebook Note, 10 June 2009